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NBCUniversal struts its Peacock streaming service in your sweaty, nostalgic face

Is Mr. Belding even alive?

nbc streaming service called peacock
Image: NBC

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NBCUniversal is joining CBS All Access, WarnerMedia, HBO, Disney, Apple, whatever, who gives a fuck – and holy crap that’s too much streaming – as it is getting set to launch its own streaming app featuring a bunch of shows you’ve already seen, some new crap based on some old crap, and some originals that are about as fresh as grey dog shit.

That’s it. If there was a shark to be jumped, it’s been jumped, flipped, fucked and slapped. NBCUniversal is calling its service “Peacock” after the NBC network logo and will launch in April 2020 with content. There’s a reboot of Punky Brewster on the docket as well as a reboot of Battlestar Galactica, the Dollar Store Star Trek. It will also carry movies from Universal, Focus Features, DreamWorks and Illumination.

Pricing is unknown at this time, but there will be ad-supported and no-ad tiers. There will also be a moment when you finally do the math on all your streaming services and realize that you are once again paying for cable, in effect, except on your terms. I suppose. We subscribe to so many different streaming services, we may as well just get cable again and DVR everything then pretend we are streaming. Don’t act like you aren’t thinking it. You just can’t do the math is all.

Side note: NBC Sports streaming blows heavy chunks, so maybe this initiative will clean up that service.

Unlike WarnerMedia, NBCUniversal’s Peacock doesn’t have Friends to fall back on as its main draw. So, it’s digging deep, like a third-grader for a booger and pulling out — Saved by the goddamn Bell.

That’s right. There’s a Saved By The Bell reboot coming, with Zack Morris doing some bullshit and hopefully long resolved his issues with lying and misogyny. While Seinfeld heads to Netflix in 2021, NBC is left with Saved By The Bell and Punky Brewster. It should be noted that Seinfeld originally aired on NBC and the Peacock won’t have it. At least it won’t be showing re-runs of the Cosby Show. Capitalizing on nostalgia has its limits and mine was when Zack Morris and friends went to college.  It died there.

Listen, I’m not going to sit here and pretend that another network, launching another streaming service is exciting or fresh or unexpected

It’s the inevitable adjustment to a market that is consumed on-demand, on mobile and at individually marketed and licensed price points. Is it better than cable or is it just repackaged cable?

Will we ever get to the point where we can pay for just the shows we want, regardless of the network? Doubt it. Wish we were there now, so I didn’t have to pay $35 a month for Sling when all I want it for is RedZone. But we aren’t, so we cough up the cash, pretend we love content but in reality, just wish we could find the time to take a pee break within the confines of whatever show we are watching.

What do you think? Getting sick of all the streaming services? Which do you plan on using? Let us know down below in the comments or carry the discussion over to our Twitter or Facebook.

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A tech writer on the internet for over 15 years for outlets such as Forbes, Wired, TNW, and others, Curtis is exhausted, burnt out and happy to just write buying guides and the occasional review for KnowTechie, the best tech blog your mom never told you about. Ephemeral existence for ephemeral times. Please send pitches and grainy pictures of the inside of your elbow to kevin@knowtechie.com

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