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Mark Zuckerberg doesn’t need a secret deal with Trump to operate within set parameters

Resistance is futile.

Mark zuckerberg as a borg
Image: KnowTechie

There have been rumors circulating that Mark Zuckerberg, CEO of your favorite social media platform to love/hate, has some sort of secret understanding with President Golf-ball Brain. Zuckerberg told Axios that there is no secret deal and you know what? I believe him. I believe that there doesn’t need to be a deal in place for him to continue to make questionable decisions.

Zuckerberg has been all over the news lately. From his absolutely wrong stance on fact-checking political speech to battling Covid-19 misinformation to actually criticizing President Crybaby Thumbs over the government’s handling of the Covid-19 pandemic. The key takeaway from all this is that Zuckerberg’s quest to understand humanity has taken him on a long, strange journey and we’re all tethered to his super white ankle.

Mark Zuckerberg does what is best for Mark Zuckerberg. He doesn’t need a deal in place to not do enough to curb hate speech on Facebook. He doesn’t need President Big Mac’s permission or endorsement to continue to allow misinformation to flow on the platform. To that end, assuming that the President has an understanding of anything more complex than what do to with a handful of mayonnaise is delusional.

Facebook has made billions off the back of the gullibility of its users

Taking this platform too seriously has resulted in antitrust investigations, $5 billion in fines, and most recently, an ad boycott to protest the proliferation of hate speech on the platform. Disney recently kind of joined in, slashing its ad budget. But all these companies don’t need to advertise on Facebook. You know what Coke is without having to see a FB ad for it.

So does Facebook do enough to curb hate speech? No, probably not. Does Zuckerberg have a deal with President Poopy Pants to keep the platform as right-wing as possible? No, probably not. Does the platform allow way too much right-wing propaganda and misinformation? Yeah, absolutely. But does it matter? Perhaps. It depends on how seriously you take Facebook. It depends on how your brain can handle even the slightest bit of critical thinking. It depends on if you think a loud moron with a YouTube channel is more of an expert than someone who dedicated their life to a particular area of study. Stupid people are gonna stupid.

“One specific critique that I’ve seen is that there are a lot of people who’ve said that maybe we’re too sympathetic or too close in some way to the Trump administration,” Zuckerberg told employees in a company-wide Q&A. “I just want to push back on that a bit. [W]e need to separate out the fact of giving people some space for discourse, from the positions that we have individually, where I feel like the company and I personally have been.”

I don’t give a shit if Zuckerberg eats dinner with the President

Even if it’s a shitty, piece of human garbage President sitting in that office, it benefits Zuckerberg to pretend to respect the office and its current occupant. But Zuckerberg doesn’t really give a shit whether it’s President Rat Hair Wig or anyone else, as long as it benefits Zuckerberg. Have you never seen The Social Network? Zuckerberg does what is best for Zuckerberg. Including layering on an inch of sunscreen to protect his human-like skin. Gotta protect the machine.

Zuckerberg, through his hard stances on free speech on Facebook (even if it’s lies and bullshit) and his thoughts on the ad boycott (in which his confidence and apathy toward advertisers was on full display), shows his truthfulness. While it would be disingenuous to claim he doesn’t lie, it doesn’t appear that he needs to. Facebook has grown too powerful for its master, there is no reason to lie. He’s said enough things that ruffle our feathers, why start lying now?

During his testimony to Congress about data privacy, he was visually stressed, annoyed, and perplexed at the verbal garbage questions coming from the boomers who barely understand how to use VHS tapes much less social media. This didn’t create lies, this created truth. Lies would create a Zuckerberg that couldn’t operate in this world. They would stress him out too much, they would destroy the machine.

We might not like Zuckerberg and we might hate Facebook, but he doesn’t give a shit and we keep using it. The trick is that we have to stop taking it so goddamn seriously. When did that start? In the early days of the internet, we were so skeptical of everything we read, so now because some person we knew back in high school posts a random meme we are so quick to believe it because of familiarity? Yes, there is misinformation on Facebook, constantly, but it’s on us to disseminate it properly, not Zuckerberg to serve it to us. He doesn’t need a deal with President Swamp Thing to keep manipulating Facebook’s users to fill his coffers.

What do you think? Should Zuckerberg take more responsibility or is Facebook just too big to handle at this point? Let us know down below in the comments or carry the discussion over to our Twitter or Facebook.

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