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The single best piece of smart home tech is definitively this

It is all, it is none. We are alive.

the universe of smart home tech
Image: Curtis Silver / KnowTechie

Google Home. Amazon Echo. Apple HomePod. Facebook Portal. This toaster. Kevin’s Roomba. Joe’s baby accessories. All of these smart devices have been invited into our homes but none of them, not a one, compares to the ultimate smart home device.

No, John, it’s not a laserdisc player.

Hue lights and other smart bulbs that change light temperature during the day are a great contender for the best piece of smart home tech. They can not only help with creating a comfortable environment without having to futz with a dimmer switch, but are cost-effective and a boon to those mentally affected by the radiance of their environment. Yet, they aren’t the one piece of smart home tech to rule them all.

The way we interact with technology, how it affects our lives, can vary from person to person depending on our job, the circumstances of our personal living situation, our financial status, and even our pets. What is important or needed for one person, might be absolute junk to the next. I don’t need a Roomba, there’s no place for it in my life, yet Kevin would gladly put a baby inside of his (sexually, not literally) if it was possible. There was an entire movie about a man falling in love with his personal electronic assistant device. One size does not fit all.

There’s an idea that explains this line of thinking. Basically, it states that no matter what we think of something, in relation to pure existence, it is always what it is and not always what we think it is. How that interacts with our own lives is constantly up for debate, a rule that has no definition, a user manual written in a language we cannot understand. No matter how useful some tech bros might think one smart device is over another, there is someone else who finds little to no value at all.

For instance, doing blow off smart coffee tables sounds like a solid Saturday night but that’s not the best use of smart tech for most people.

There’s a subsection of smart tech users who believe in and utilize tech that falls into a micro scientific category, ignoring devices that control the temperature in the house to focus on engineering toys you may find in the back of a comic book from the 1960s. The Cold War, after all, is still alive and well. This is more of a niche category and wouldn’t be considered as something that is necessary or applicable to all of us.

What do we consider best? With so much smart home tech on the market, it’s arguably subjective to stand here on a plastic milk crate and declare one single piece of tech as having more inherent value than the rest. Is it about keeping our smart homes secure? Is it about keeping our smart homes comfortable? What is your current sense of security or comfort?

Your smartphone could easily be considered the most integral piece of smart home tech you own as that is the control hub for everything else. All the apps are located in your pocket, without that device there is no control, there is no security or comfort. To that end, you yourself could very well be the key to the existence and function of smart tech. Without whatever need is filled by smart home tech affecting you in some way, changing your life for the better, smart home tech is nothing more than a collection of sleek tchotchkes.

The single best piece of smart home tech is you. While this isn’t intended to reveal that you are in fact, a complex AI built by our future overlords to infiltrate 21st-century society, it is intended to imply that smart home tech, for all our bickering and discussion, is a subjective luxury that we control.

Smart home tech and whatever layered psychosis it pulls from the depths of our souls in relation to how we function in life is completely up to you. There is no one piece of smart home tech that if we all had, would make us all better. We each choose the form of our destructor, put it on the coffee table or nightstand and slowly fade into a reality that could only have been imagined by the most creative of science fiction authors. The choice is yours.

We are affected. So choose wisely.

What do you think? Do you agree? Let us know down below in the comments or carry the discussion over to our Twitter or Facebook.

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Writing about consumer technology, social media and the deep layers of psychological torture endured by all of it. The world is changing, but that doesn't mean we can't be cynical about it. It's not all sunshine and roses in Silicon Valley. It's self loathing, pretentiousness and machines that squeeze juice for you. Also, a strong affinity for toasters.Follow on Twitter @cebsilver for them jokes. Chaotic neutral. Pitches to cebsilver@gmail.com

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